This article is a guest post by a college friend, Abby Walters Blackmon. She and her husband are in the process of adopting a child from Haiti.
I am sitting on the “supper porch” of Liberty Lodge, two portable heaters blowing, diet coke a short reach away, pen in hand. My husband, no fool, sits inside studying 1 Samuel. Our three children here with us are all in various stages of waking (or not). The two children not with us are either on a mountain side in East Tennessee or on a mountain side 1400 miles away in Haiti. This week was supposed to be our first whole family vacation, the eldest skipping a few days of university to celebrate the homecoming of the newest.
But.
As is so often the case, our plans are not God’s plans. And so we wait. I could say we are waiting on paperwork, the molasses-thick pace of the Haitian system, or the right email being sent by the right elected official to the right recipient in the American Embassy in Port au Prince. I could say we are waiting on a process which nine months ago we were assured would take six weeks! Each of those statements is fact.
The TRUTH is, we are waiting on God. It occurred to me a couple of weeks ago that I am right smack-dab up against a wall. A God-sized wall: impenetrable, unclimbable, un get-around-able God wall. I don’t mind telling you I was pretty angry about it (read: righteously pissed off). Then His Word came unbidden, ” Blessed are the poor in spirit…;” “He is close to the broken hearted . . .;” “Hope does not disappoint us.”
I realized that wall is not only God- sized; it is God-love, and if I would just LEAN IN and REST in His promises He would be faithful. Well, no. He’s going to be faithful. The choice to rail against or lean in was mine. So I’m leaning. And I do have joy in hope today. As I look around my favorite house on my favorite island, I am boldly sitting at the foot of His throne, resting in His promises. She’ll be here with her forever family just exactly according to His pleasing and perfect will.
Dr. Abby Walters Blackmon is a pediatrician in Knoxville, TN. She’s a child of God by grace; wife and mother by love; East Tennessean by birth; Geechee (or low country) girl by choice; lover of Haiti by heart.
Respond to Abby’s article by clicking “Comment” above.
You can follow Abby in her progress towards adoption and her writing on Facebook at Abby Walters Blackmon.
Lovely, poetic truths of God’s promises, Abby, as we wait…assured of His promises that His will is perfect for us!
Thank you for taking the time to write this article. Your words, “The choice to rail against or lean in was mine. So I’m leaning. ” is a word picture I can carry with me. Your “leaning in” and waiting carries more weight because I can’t imagine someone with so much energy (MD, mother, wife, missionary, …) waiting. Most of us try to obtain mastery of virtues on our own. At the point of decision when it comes time for me to decide who’s will, “lean in” will help me turn my will over. Thanks
Dear Ms. Abby,
We only know each other through my children, but I feel your heartache. I have never gone through what you are, but I want you to know that I am praying for you and your family and hope that your daughter will be with you soon. It is very hard to wait, but God’s plans are not our plans and so we must wait. I will rejoice with you when she gets here!! May God give you the strength to lean on Him!
Sincerely,
Dawn Parks
Abby, Thank you for writing this. You have helped someone with your penned words…me. Thank you. I love you. Janette